I run hot and cold with Bill Maher. Personally, I prefer John Oliver or Stephen Colbert. Yes, Maher has his moments reveling in provocation, and sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t.

I remember when he tangled with National Review Editor Rich Lowry about January 6 last fall before the election and the fact that Lowry was voting for Donald Trump. It dumbfounded me, and still does, that people can condemn Trump for January 6, trash him as undemocratic, and then go out on Election Day and pull the lever for him. Maher called out Lowry’s hypocrisy.

But last week Maher proved his hypocrisy and his obtuseness. After being invited to dinner at the White House, Maher emerged not just impressed but charmed. Yes, charmed, as if he’d just spent an evening with Trump akin to Smithers doddering around and supplicating to Montgomery Burns on The Simpsons. Both fawning over a man who treats others like garbage.

In recounting the evening to the New York Post, Maher gushed that Trump was “fun” and “generous,” even touting the “sweet” gift he received. “And I know that as I say that, millions of liberal sphincters just tightened,” Maher quipped.

Well, Bill, in this instance, you are the sphincter.

That might sound crude, but I have a synonym in mind that’s better — begins with an a and ends in an e. Because while Maher is patting himself on the back for being iconoclastic and unpredictable, he’s doing exactly what Trump wants, and that is normalizing a man who is not only inherently dangerous but who wreaks havoc on innocent lives and democracy.

I’ve spoken to many people who’ve known Trump personally, and every one of them, including Mary Trump, Anthony Scaramucci, and the author of Apprentice in Wonderland, Ramin Setoodeh, who met with Trump nine times. They all told me the same thing. In person, Donald Trump can be disarmingly charming. 

That’s his greatest con. He knows how to smile just enough, compliment you just right, and make you feel special. But it’s a trick. A mask. Because behind that charade is a man bent on destruction who only cares about one thing — himself. 

Maher was duped, like so many others. He’s no different than House Republicans who lick Trump’s feet, tech CEOs and Wall Street titans who fear a Truth Social tantrum, and big law firms that are scrambling to be extorted by the “Dear Leader.”

Maher’s fatal mistake wasn’t going to dinner. It was giving the impression, publicly and gleefully, that Trump is harmless. Even fun. Because Trump is neither. In just three months since returning to office, he has launched an all-out assault against decency and empathy. Trump has never been decent and never cared about anyone but himself..

Trump has already signed legislation that slashes Medicare and Medicaid with the recent stopgap spending bill. These are two lifelines for the poor and elderly, and the cuts come while proposing yet another round of tax breaks for the ultrawealthy. If you’re rich, you’re popping champagne. If you’re sick, disabled, or aging in poverty? Unlike Maher, you won’t be invited to the White House.

He has gutted DEI programs across the federal government, targeting racial equity initiatives, LGBTQ+ protections, and disability access. He has directed agencies to erase the word “transgender” from official documents. He’s not just trying to suppress an identity, he’s trying to wipe transgender people from existence.

Internationally, his cuts to the U.S. Agency for International Development are decimating lifesaving programs. Particularly in Africa, where funding for HIV and AIDS treatment and prevention has been drastically slashed. UNAIDS estimatesthat just a 10 percent drop in international funding could result in over 500,000 additional AIDS-related deaths per year. Trump’s cuts aren’t just heartless. They’re lethal.

Meanwhile, he has used the full power of the presidency to target and ruin private citizens. Just last week, Trump signed executive orders targeting two officials from his first term, Chris Krebs and Miles Taylor. They dared to tell the truth about the first term. 

These aren’t just symbolic acts. Trump’s rhetoric and executive vendettas lead directly to death threats, financial ruin, and lives lived in hiding. Krebs and Taylor, like so many others, now must live with security threats, legal bills, and fear. They aren’t billionaires. They can’t buy safety. Maher can. He won’t lose a moment of sleep if Trump ever turns on him.

And yet Maher dismisses Trump’s monstrous record as if it were a punch line. He waves off the racist birtherism Trump peddled for years, the calls for a Muslim ban, the mocking of a disabled journalist, the infamous “shithole countries” remark, the praise for white supremacists in Charlottesville. The sexual assault allegations? The encouragement of political violence? The cozying up to dictators?

I’ve written extensively about Trump’s manipulative appeal. I’ve talked to Mary Trump, who knows the pathology firsthand, and Scaramucci, who confessed to how quickly and easily he got swept up before realizing the nightmare. Setoodeh chronicled Trump’s obsession with media and fame, and his desperate need to control every narrative. 

That’s what makes moments like Maher’s dinner so dangerous. Trump lives for this kind of PR. He doesn’t need your vote, just your platform. He’ll use your kindness as a cudgel against your values. And he’s doing it now.

Here’s what Maher misses entirely: When Trump ruins someone’s life, it’s not entertainment. When he cuts programs, people die. When he targets minorities, children lose access to food, housing, and medicine. When he tries to erase a transgender person, their mental health suffers incredibly. When he tweets about private citizens, they’re forced into hiding. This isn’t funny. It’s fascism. It’s real.

Bill Maher went to dinner and came back with a gift. I hope it was worth it, because the rest of us are still counting the cost and bracing for the impending impact of Trump’s “gifts” to us.

So no, Bill, it’s not “millions of liberal sphincters” tightening. It’s millions of Americans tightening their grip on survival, health care, civil rights, and hope while you wine and dine at a fancy dinner with the man who wants to take it all away.